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At the end of freshman year, I wrote my first ever research essay. The vague topic of defining a single emotion stumped me: sadness and happiness were too easy and the other feelings were unrelatable. So I took a different route. I chose confidence, an attribute anyone can experience emotionally.
I know Ms. Kasyanik gave me an A for this paper, a grade which shocked me! Beginning to end, my lack of flow ruined the essay. I jumped from idea to idea, never stopping to fully develop a single one or related one to another. Incomplete thoughts render this essay incomprehensible, what message am I trying to get across? An unspecific thesis ruins this piece, leaving the reader to wonder the author's purpose. Furthermore, a new skill I learned under Mrs. Manugo's discretion could have been utilized. The point-prove-explain method could have expanded upon many of the quotes I used, especially the paragraph solely containing quote after quote after quote. With this new ability, I could take these quotes and add original ideas to create a fully developed body paragraph rather than fragmented pieces of one. As I reflect upon my work from four years ago, I literally shake my head at the sad piece of work I actually turned in for someone else to read. How could I? I can clearly see my growth as a writer, marking countless mistakes in this primitive piece. I almost want to rewrite it entirely, knowing I am capable of much better. Thank you, Mrs. Manugo, for giving me all the knowledge I now have. |